Sunday, Bloody Sunday

Sunday is my birthday. Sunday is also mother's day.

I'm not looking forward to being 26. I am of the opinion that the increased risk of Down's Syndrome in children whose mothers were over age 35 when they were pregnant is not worht it.
I have no problem with disabilities (my mom's blind for chrissake), or with having a baby with a disability, but I do have a problem with being selfish enough to want a baby when I'm older and risk their health and livelihood in order to get one. Therefore I have (many years ago) set forth the prohibition that I will have my tubes tied on my 35th birthday at the latest (barring the fact that I may be pregnant at that point, in which case the surgery will happen directly after labor).
I was good at being pregnant, I wasn't moody, I didn't get grotesquely huge, I was totally healthy, and I liked it ( I blame this on the hormones), at least everything but the 3 a.m. leg cramp wake-up calls.
I was even good at labor. Apparently the god and goddess put my body together solely for the purpose of procreation. Sadly, I haven't been given the opportunity to see what it can really do.
Since I will be 26 in roughly 96 hours I am becoming more and more concerned about this.
I only have 9 more years before my shelf life is over.
That may seem like a long time but I started counting my remaining years of fecundity when Mina was born, 6 years ago. I've gone from "Not to worry I've still got 15 more years left" to " Oh crap! I've only got 9 more years left!!".
This wouldn't be so bad except that I don't want another one-night-stand style baby who I have to raise on my own, alone, lonely... you get the picture. So instead I have to strike up a meaningful relationship with someone who will stick around and who can handle my bizarre personality quirks, not to mention my child. And who will carry their own weight at home and in the money department.
I have no sympathy for men who come home from work and plop on the couch while the little wifey wrestles the screaming hordes of infidels while making dinner, doing their laundry and taking the time to politely ask how their day was. They are bastards and should all be drug out into the street and shot.
That is SO Canadian!
Men no longer are the sole money-makers of a household, yet even if their wives are working just as much as they are they still seem to have it in their heads that she should handle all the household management and child-rearing as well.
Anyway, I could go on like this for a while as it is one of my greatest pet peeves, but I won't.
The point is that it could still take me several years to find a guy, convince him not to ditch me for the blonde next door, get settled together and secure (this doesn't necessarily mean married, I'm not much of a believer in marriage; although it would be nice if someone at least offered so I knew how serious they were about me), get preggers and then actually have the baby. because of all of this, 9 years just isn't that much. I'm beginning to think that Mina may be an only child after all, poor kid. This worries me a lot, who will she have when I'm gone? All of her close relatives are older than her, I worry that when she' s older if something happens to me she won't have anyone to share her pain with. I've depended on my brother and sister for this, we drive each other crazy at times but we really need each other too. Mina won't have that.
Well this post kind of went off on a tangent.. I ws going to discuss my plans for the weekend and the torture I went through last night, but I suppose I should save those for later...